Military Mom #2
One of the hardest parts of having a son or daughter at war in the Middle East is NOT knowing what they are doing. The ‘mission’ they have been assigned is not to be disclosed and you are left in the dark – to just wonder. But because you care so much, you cannot JUST let it go, put it out of your mind or tell yourself it doesn’t matter. Sometimes you think you are going crazy because one day you are composed and feel like everything is fine – you can do this, and then the next day, you find yourself worried and anxious – wanting to know SOMETHING (anything!).
What’s happening war-wise is in the news, you read about it in the newspapers or on your computers so it’s impossible NOT to be aware of the world’s conditions and how extremely dangerous/life-threatening the war is for the soldiers. Not knowing anything about what your son/daughter is going through environmentally, emotionally, mentally or psychologically can be most frustrating and insane if you don’t prepare yourself or find a compassionate group who understands. You can tell yourself – ‘It’s OK – I don’t need to know everything’ – but not knowing ANYTHING is hard to cope with on a day-to-day, everyday basis. It’s sort of like being in the waiting room (make it a pitch-black waiting room) of a hospital, waiting for the doctor to tell you the outcome of a vital operation being performed on a loved one. But in this case, you are waiting and waiting and waiting, day-in and day-out until it gets to be almost unbearable. In reality, you DO get to hear from your ‘war-hero’ from time to time, but they never tell you anything they are doing that’s related to the war – you only talk small talk about home and what’s happening with you but nothing that has to do with them and the immediate and important things going on in their lives. That can be insanity after a while too. Some parents take time out for a 5-minute scream in the garage where no one can hear them. For some it seems to help.
One group that is very helpful is the Blue Star MOMs of America. Here mothers (sometimes fathers too) come together to talk, do what they can and just express what they are going through – how they feel. They support one another. If you go, you will find out that you are NOT alone, you are NOT crazy, but what you’re feeling is normal for those who are going through the hell-of-war from the home front. The first meeting I went to, I couldn’t believe it – here were others who had the same look on their faces as I did.. Not exactly a stare but a groping kind of look – looking for a way out emotionally but knowing there really isn’t one. The AV Blue Star Mothers meet in Lancaster @ Grace Resources every 1st and 3rd Tuesdays of each month – 7:00PM. They support Our Troops and their families in a variety of ways such as: sending letters of encouragement and care packages, giving military families’ children in the AV area Christmas presents and they have various fund raisers. If you are interested and need more information, please call Elisa Clark, president 661-940-0498.
If you have any comments or questions, please feel free to email me at mom_military@yahoo.com. .
